How frustrating is it when you ask your child about their day and they say “good” or fine”?
A question we get asked often by our families is – how do I get my child to talk about their day?
Is this a problem for you too?
Would you love to be able to talk to your child about their day more easily?
This is a topic I speak to a lot of parents about….
The first place to start though is to think about how you respond when asked; “how’s your day?”. If you are anything like me – your answer will be;
“it’s been good”
or
“it’s been busy”
It’s not a proper answer though as it doesn’t give the person asking much insight into your day.
This is the same when we ask children about their day. They answer with “good” or “fine”.
So this got me thinking that maybe the best way tackle this problem by starting with how we talk about our day.
We need to give our children better answers to listen to.
We need to also talk about the reason it was fine, good or busy.
So start by first is to modelling a better response
“my day has been great because I managed to get all my jobs done”
or
“it’s been busy because I had a surprise meeting”
or
“it’s been frustrating because i had a flat tyre and had to wait for the RAC man”
Adding the ‘because’ – gives a reason for our answer, gives more information and also gives the listener a chance to discover more about you so that they can add to conversation.
This may be easier to do with your child in the car on their way from school where everyone takes a turn talking about their day or around the dinner table.
Make sure you go first so that your child can listen to your answer.
If they still answer ‘fine’ – try to ask them – “why?” …
“why was your day good?”
or
“what made your day good?”
If they get stuck, give them a choice “was your day fine because you had art or because you got to play with Liam?”.
With practise and lots of modelling, you will start to see results with your child increasingly adding more information about what they did and how they felt about their day.
Let us know how you go.
If you have any questions, or get stuck, just get in touch with us.
